Hypnopedia
I learn hard subjects, friends, the easy way.
My consciousness expands while I’m asleep.
I’m snoring — but I’d really like to say
I learn hard subjects, friends, the easy way.
No challenge known can massively dismay
my nightly self. Though effortless, I’m deep.
I learn hard subjects, friends, the easy way.
My consciousness expands while I’m asleep.
–Tom Riley
Hope
Are my enemies writhing in Hell?
Are they under the permanent spell
of the Devil? Regret:
I cannot say that yet–
but I hope things may end up that well.
–Tom Riley
Call for Breakfast
“Where’s my breakfast?” he called. “I’ve a hunch
that you haven’t been thinking a bunch
about how I need food.
Ah, but now you’ve been cued!”
“You’ll get breakfast,” she answered, “at lunch.”
–Tom Riley
Heavy Responsibility
“It is time, my dear sir, for your nap.
Let the warm arms of slumber enwrap
what’s not comfy in you!
See your softest dreams through!”
“Yet another chore thrown in my lap!”
–Tom Riley
Shock Treatment
Sir, it’s time to become a go-getter
and to earn a brand new lively letter.
Though you lazily sit,
though you’re feeling like shit,
if you leap to your feet, you’ll feel better.
–Tom Riley
On the Wind
“You’ll find your answer, seeker, on the wind!”
“The answers I obtain there tend to blow.”
“Down is the way a sage will not be pinned.
You’ll find your answer, seeker, on the wind!
You never need acknowledge that you’ve sinned.
A vacant look — and you’ll be in the know.
You’ll find your answer, seeker, on the wind!”
“The answers I obtain there tend to blow.”
–Tom Riley
Humanitarian Crisis
The invasion of Europe commences!
Europe’s spirit accepts the expenses.
They are done, the Crusades!
Christian zeal swiftly fades.
Muslim zeal levels all walls and fences.
–Tom Riley
Rewrite
You forgot to go back and rewrite
what was wrong. You forgot that the light
is obscured by stray words
that become mindless herds.
Now you’ll never, I fear, get it right.
–Tom Riley
Assless Guys
“The guidance of the angels saves your ass!”
“I’d rather not depend on assless guys
for that.” “Assurance of a higher class:
the guidance of the angels saves your ass
from lions that might catch up and surpass,
from wickedness that’s finally too wise.
The guidance of the angels saves your ass!”
“I’d rather not depend on assless guys.”
–Tom Riley
Idle Hope
He is hoping your crew has discussed him
in hushed tones, that perhaps you have cussed him,
safely out of his hearing.
But his hope’s disappearing.
He’s achieved one result: you don’t trust him.
–Tom Riley
Flammeus Gladius 