The only thing that’s wrong with my religion
is that it’s shared, dear sir, with such as you.
Do I profess dissent? Nay, not a smidgen!
But do I sneer at idiots? A few.
The foolish things you think and say and do
offend the edges of my cerebration.
I sneer indeed at you and all your crew–
but you go on producing bloviation.
I don’t equate your faulty cogitation
with the True Faith — but you do, sir, and loudly.
I am sore tried by such humiliation.
“Humility!” you shout — and shout it proudly.
I think you’re dumb. Yes: that’s what I’m confessing.
And now, O Holy Father, grant your blessing….