Dangerous foreign blonde approached the car—
But all-American Mohamed Noor
Was ready, though a trifle insecure.
How can Somali heroes know how far
An Aussie girl might go? The perils are
Real perils, for the Infidel’s impure!
He pulled the trigger quick, just to be sure.
And now in the Department he’s a star.
He saved us from that bright and charming smile.
He saved us from her foul white privilege too.
The customs of the West have long been vile—
But he helped to reform them. Made anew,
America should celebrate in style.
Her women, though, should cover up on cue.