Yucky, Icky, Scary Guns!

by flammeusgladius

Yucky, Icky, Scary Guns!


Become a frightened little girl, like Shea!
That is the truly Christian way to be.
The history of Christianity
Is an embarrassment to wish away.
Guns ought to be a cause of sheer dismay
For Christians. Baptized souls should shake to see
A 30-06 or a .303.
They ought to try to act a little gay.
Now cut that out! It’s thoroughly unfair!
Shea wears a manly beard. His leftist stance
On firearms doesn’t mean his underwear
Is powder blue. Societies advance.
The Viking Shea is virile as a bear—
Though seeing popguns makes him wet his pants.


—Tom Riley


(Planned Parenthood ally and notorious glutton Mark Shea calls for repeal of Second Amendment.)