Role Model

Role Model

“Now to be Gay Obama I’ll try!”
Mayor Pete says – a little too sly.
Pete, you may well believe,
But you cannot achieve—
For Barack was already that guy.

–Tom Riley

Yet Another Democrat

Yet Another Democrat

Some Montana guy’s now in the race
To beat Trump, whom he calls a disgrace.
Others have the same aim.
What? Remember his name?
I can’t even remember his face.

–Tom Riley

Lord of Ithaca

Lord of Ithaca

The Lord of Ithaca is vital still,
Although he died millennia ago.
Critiques from so-called Christians make me ill.
The Lord of Ithaca is vital still.
A keen wit and a concentrated will:
High virtues must be envied by the low.
The Lord of Ithaca is vital still—
Although he died millennia ago.

–Tom Riley

Ulysses and Calypso, by Henrik van Balen

Bruno’s Hero

Bruno’s Hero

Admiring Bruno gazes up at Tim.
A dad who does real work commands respect.
For real work there is no true synonym.
Admiring Bruno gazes up at Tim.
Ain’t no one as amazing, friends, as him—
And in him there is no flaw to detect.
Admiring Bruno gazes up at Tim.
A dad who does real work commands respect.

–Tom Riley

Real Work

Real Work

(for Stollers)

Get off your lazy ass, you big fat jerk!
This isn’t how America was made!
(Timothy Stoll is doing work. Real work.)

Clearly, you’re dripping with the urge to shirk.
At the word “job,” you’re suddenly afraid.
Get off your lazy ass, you big fat jerk!

You’re driving the industrious berserk!
Luckily, there’s a guy who makes the grade:
Timothy Stoll is doing work – real work!

You’re not impressed? Erase that stupid smirk!
We will not see such disrespect displayed!
Get off your lazy ass, you big fat jerk!

Your very sessile presence tends to irk.
Why are you now expecting to be paid?
Timothy Stoll is doing work. Real work!

He’s a true hero now, like Captain Kirk.
His standards have by you, though, been betrayed.
Get off your lazy ass, you big fat jerk!
Timothy Stoll is doing work. (Real work!)

–Tom Riley

Lysistrata 2019

Lysistrata 2019

Boy, those sex-striking ladies are pissed!
In their slaughter they mean to persist.
Laws against it they hate—
And with men will not mate.
I suspect they will hardly be missed.

–Tom Riley

Barr Exam

Barr Exam

Democrats howl the anguish of their hearts—
But now the real investigation starts.

–Tom Riley

League Standing

League Standing

(for D.N. O’Brien)

“The League of Right-Wing Poets must be stopped!”
Thus the command went out. “O’Brien first!”
For toleration leftists rarely opt:
Thus, liberal oppression is the worst.
They found you, too, defiant and accursed,
And, fierce to shut you up, they dragged you in—
Because your scathing little rhymes had burst
Their vague balloons, their fragile left-wing spin.
Check to the King, though, doesn’t always win.
A guard grunts – then you hear his weight collapse.
Bard on the Hill appears with great wide grin—
And Riley, too. What unexpected chaps
To find in this remote Australian sphere!
“League sent us both to break you out of here!”

–Tom Riley

Whine Country

Whine Country

Mueller’s rushing to whine about Barr.
Special Counsel’s no longer a star.
It’s a fact he’s not faced.
“Emphasis was misplaced!”
Goes the whine – but it will not get far.

–Tom Riley

T Is for Typical!

T Is for Typical!

Toward the battle I flew not – but ran.
Though not steely, I do what I can.
Now I’m holding the line.
One advantage is mine:
Kryptonite can’t harm Typical Man!

–Tom Riley