Joe Biden Is Innocent of All Charges

Joe Biden Is Innocent of All Charges

 

“That was statesmanship, kid, not a scam!

I was proving that I give a damn,

Not just helping my son!

Blame?  I truly bear none—

For I never quite know where I am….”

 

–Tom Riley

 

Pretty Little Swedish Girl

Pretty Little Swedish Girl

 

Greta isn’t a globalist dupe—

As her critics contend.  Join her troop—

And how noble you’ll feel!

You fool!  Greta is real—

And she’ll presently vomit pea soup.

 

–Tom Riley

 

What to Say

What to Say

 

Biden now tells reporters what to say—

And most of them are happy to comply.

Don’t ask improper questions!  Just obey!

Biden now tells reporters.  What to say

In response to such arrogance today?

Hey, kids, that’s up to Joe – a lovely guy!

Biden now tells reporters what to say,

And most of them are happy to comply.

 

–Tom Riley

Problem-Solving Ability

Problem-Solving Ability

 

You object to the story in vain.

Biden had to resort to a chain!

Though to peace all aspire,

Circumstances were dire.

Plus, Joe never had much of a brain.

 

–Tom Riley

Joe Biden Chains Negroes

Joe Biden Chains Negroes

 

“With his chain, Biden won some respect

From the gang leader Corn Pop, correct?

Story’s true.  Ain’t no lie.

Joe’s a really tough guy!”

Is that irony, sir, I detect?

 

–Tom Riley

 

Sound of the Man Working on the Chain Gang

The Sound of the Man Working on the Chain Gang

 

How do you make a black friend?  Bring a chain!

Joe Biden did, and everything worked out

Just fine.  So that’s a rule we must maintain:

How do you make a black friend?  Bring a chain.

Joe’s threats against that Corn Pop guy – a pain

Right in Joe’s ass! – succeeded.  Do you doubt?

How do you make a black friend?  Bring a chain!

Joe Biden did – and everything worked out!

 

–Tom Riley

 

 

(Biden story recommends chains and threats as best way of dealing with black guys.)

Attractions of Mrs. Warren

The Attractions of Mrs. Warren

 

Is Elizabeth gorgeous?  Well, no.

Is she clever?  I wouldn’t say so.

But we cannot ignore her.

She has this going for her:

She is not (thank the Lord!) Creepy Joe.

 

–Tom Riley

 

Heroic Figures

Heroic Figures

 

Shea’s heroic, they say, to a fault.

He embraces the hero gestalt.

He is Superman squared:

Super-fat, super-haired.

And his sidekick is Scott Eric Alt.

 

–Tom Riley

Puppy Love

Puppy Love

 

Has Shea learned to love dogs?  Not quite yet.

He still wants them destroyed.  No regret.

You like dogs.  Shea does not.

His tastes differ – a lot.

He keeps Scott Eric Alt as his pet.

 

–Tom Riley

 

 

Junior Partner

Junior Partner

 

Praising Shea:  Mr. Alt just won’t stop.

He’s a don’t-diss-Mark-Shea comment cop!

Such deep friendship is rare.

Oh, yes:  they’re quite a pair!

But remember:  Shea’s always on top.

 

–Tom Riley