Blacks and Latinos need the Mighty Shea.
How could they live without their White Protector?
Both in the public and the private sector,
He fights for them the Nazi-hunter way.
He may be lily white, but no vague gray
Distorts the readings of his hate detector.
Of all Caucasian faults, he’s the corrector.
What strength and zeal his posts and tweets display!
Blacks and Latinos: thank him for his views!
Even in quarantine, he has your back.
Behind the screen, he’s truly paid his dues.
Of racist comments he is keeping track.
You don’t applaud – despite his many cues?
Your laughter is a personal attack!
There’s whores and then there’s whores and then there’s whores.
The mainstream media contain all three.
Some merely boost their own financial scores
By glaring acts of sheer dishonesty.
To please their clients, some strive eagerly
As if full payment were an afterthought.
Some love producing cheap pornography
For its own sake. What wonders they have wrought!
Some even dare pretend they can’t be bought.
These are the funniest and most absurd.
In networks of hypocrisy they’re caught
Whenever their repeated lies are heard.
You’ve done just half your duty, S.E. Cupp.
You’ve jacked Joe Biden off. Now clean him up.
(S.E. Cupp delivers standard media whore boilerplate in mindless op-ed.)
Pope Francis is the type who worships science—
Or was until he made his latest dumb
Pronouncement. Now he’s total in reliance
On Gaia’s cultic wisdom. Me, I’m numb
At how this aging infant sucks his thumb
In public and proclaims stupidity
As doctrine. Can’t he do the minimum
In self-embarrassment – for you and me?
The idiocy uttered currently,
Of course, will fade eventually away.
He can’t get saints and angels to agree
With the vain salivation of today.
Still, he’s amongst my soul’s most gnawing stressors.
What’s worse, he’s undermining his successors.
Unlike you whiny white Caucasian creeps,
The archetypal hero named Mark Shea
Embodies deep concern that never sleeps.
His charitable thoughts go out all day
And night – to others, in a Christian way!
Well, yes: though only technically, he’s white
As well. But that’s a nasty thing to say
To one who keeps the colored folks in sight
With fondness! All you racists on the right
Think citing facts can undermine Shea’s glory.
Your hearts are selfish, and your points are trite.
Mark Shea will tell his own resplendent story!
He thinks of others – and his thoughts are sunny
When that’s to his advantage. Send him money.
(Shameless faux-Viking beggar Mark Shea decries whiny whites who think only of themselves.)