Incredible Sigmund Pezzulo
The Incredible Sigmund Pezzulo
Furor impius intus,
saeva sedens super arma, et centum vinctus aenis
post tergum nodis, fremet horridus ore cruent.
—Vergil, Aeneid, 1.294-296
The slug Pezzulo psychoanalyzes
The ancient world. The Romans were sadistic.
Not one cell in her slug brain realizes
That such a statement isn’t realistic.
Of course, it’s simple – being thus simplistic.
And that to the Pezzulo is a plus.
Of facile impulse she’s become a mystic.
Her mantra echoes, dripping snot and pus.
It doesn’t matter that she’s vacuous.
Her bonehead fans will lick up all that slime
And hail her fantasies as virtuous.
She knows they will. They do it all the time!
A rape by Tiber’s sons has been suggested.
They glance at her and are not interested.
–Tom Riley