Flammeus Gladius

Carmina et Verba pro Discipulis Meis

Tag: Bruce Springsteen

In Point of Fact

In Point of Fact

 

Barack, in point of fact, broke no one’s nose.
Michelle is the Obama who can hit.
Barack’s a gutless sissy – and it shows.
Barack in point of fact broke no one’s nose.
Needing both hands to fix his panty hose,
He must have thrown instead a hissy fit.
Barack (in point of fact) broke no one’s nose.
Michelle is the Obama who can hit.

 

–Tom Riley

 

Image result for obama sissy

 

(In Springsteen interview, Obama tells implausible tough guy tale.)

Springsteen Defense

The Springsteen Defense

 

 

Oh, sure! If only Springsteen, has-been punk,
Had brought his full force regally to bear—
The concentration of a Shaolin monk,
The wisdom that he’s eager now to share,
The neon sign that says he’ll always care,
The eloquence that makes him Cicero—
Why, then, the bastard Trump would not be there
In office as our apprehensions grow.
Springsteen, you fraud: the Jersey thugs I know
Laugh at the cracked pretensions you project.
A twelve-year-old who snuck into your show
Could kick your skinny ass. Do I detect
Madness in these vain whines that you renew?
Trump whipped the world. He’d make short work of you.

 

 

–Tom Riley

 

 

(Megalomaniacal Springsteen pretends he could have stopped Trump.)

Bathroom Rights

Bathroom Rights

 

 

The sacred right of guys to bring their pricks
into the ladies’ room must never be
infringed — for, in their souls, those guys are chicks
and treasure feminine identity
far more than famous gals like Hillary
have ever thought of doing. Hey, you jerks
and bigots! Let a tranny take a pee!
This new, improved arrangement really works.
I know you think some rabid pervert lurks
in a stall there, intent on flashing peter
at little girls like yours. Well, up she perks!
Cross-dressing Kong has found the way to greet her!
It’s all gain, see, and never any loss.
It’s forcefully supported by the Boss.

 

 

–Tom Riley

 

 

(Bruce Springsteen cancels North Carolina appearance.)