Old Marse Robert Samples Aleksandr Dugin’s Vodka and Finds It Good

Old Marse Robert Samples Aleksandr Dugin’s Vodka and Finds It Good

“Aggressive abroad and despotic at home.”

The unipolar world is at an end—
Which suits me fine. The Yankees went too far,
As Yankees always go. Now they descend.
I’m watching their imaginary star
Plummet. The tortured earth it’s sure to scar
Again – a sort of global spouse abuse.
But keep the victim handcuffed? No cigar.
Expecting that, the Yankees prove obtuse
Beyond their former measure. Fast and loose
They’ve played since 1860. For a while,
It served them well. But now, neck in the noose,
Their empire will be throttled, and in style.
And all of the disasters that we see?
Predicted by the Last of Heroes, Lee.

–Tom Riley

A Brand New New Orleans

A Brand New New Orleans

(for the Rev. Larry Beane)

In New Orleans, the Rebel cause is done.
They rush to worship Zulu idols now.
You Western Civ types shouldn’t have a cow.
Idolatry is popular and fun!
In former European times, the Sun
Was worshipped – as historians allow.
So why can’t our society kowtow
To savage whores? Your reasons given? None!
Let spiritual license now extend
Into the region of the Southern Cross!
Monotheistic claptrap had to end.
We douse our cities now in heathen sauce.
Crudity is the message we intend.
The Christian heroes of the South? No loss.

–Tom Riley

True Dread

True Dread

If only Stonewall Jackson could have led
The insurrection at the Capitol!
Our congresscowards would have known true dread—
If only Stonewall Jackson could have led
Northern Virginia’s finest men ahead
Against Leviathan. Do I appall?
If only Stonewall Jackson could have led
The insurrection at the Capitol!

–Tom Riley

Nathan Bedford Forrest

Nathan Bedford Forrest

Old Marse Robert said you were the best.
Sherman said the same thing. That’s a test
Few among us could pass.
Now it’s scorn you amass
From the weak. How the culture’s progressed!

–Tom Riley

Next Step

The Next Step

With the truth let us play fast and loose—
For it pays to prolong woke abuse.
Rebel statues are down.
We’ve “elected” a clown.
Thus it’s time to condemn Dr. Seuss!

–Tom Riley

Ghost of Johnny Reb

The Ghost of Johnny Reb

Do pansy soldiers, preening technocrats,
Condemn you, Johnny Reb? Ha! What a laugh!
Let your ghost be untroubled by such gnats!
Do pansy soldiers, preening technocrats,
Latter-day self-important Yankee rats
Proclaim themselves the wheat and you the chaff?
Do pansy soldiers, preening technocrats,
Condemn you, Johnny Reb? Ha! What a laugh!

–Tom Riley

General Vacuity

General Vacuity

Riding the wave of bogus righteousness,
General Seidule displays his stuff:
Subservience to every stinking mess
Of ideology. Simplistic? Tough!
Of simplemindedness there’s not enough
According to the standards now embraced.
Spare him the other side and all that guff.
Some facts he loves – but others won’t be faced.
For Southern battle flags he has no taste—
And monuments he will not tolerate.
Let all those whom we honored be debased!
Adore the sick! Calumniate the great!
Hold hands with pansies! Piss upon brave men!
Seidule will not feel so gutless then.

–Tom Riley

Hey, Look!

Hey, Look!

“I’m leaving you,”
said Southern Belle.
There were no tears
yet,
but the tight-lipped expression
was full of pain.
“The magic is gone.
Besides, you’ve become
intolerably preachy
and abusive.”

Billy Yank responded
with a backhand
of industrial strength
that loosened Belle’s small white teeth
and spattered blood
in an unforgettable
pattern
all over wall and floor.

During the perfunctory
rape that followed,
Billy yawned,
displaying square
yellow chompers
the size of family bibles.
“Must preserve the union.
Hey, look!
I freed the slaves!”

–Tom Riley

If Only

If Only

If only Grant had used transgender troops,
He would have beaten Lee a whole lot quicker.
He would have pummeled all those rebel poops!
If only Grant had used transgender troops,
Though stumbling in impressive high heels – oops!—
He could have made the weary South much sicker.
If only Grant had used transgender troops,
He would have beaten Lee a whole lot quicker!

–Tom Riley

Bow Down

Bow Down

The Yankees won – so now we all bow down
To tyranny’s enduring crazy seat
In Washington, D.C. Who wears the crown?
The Yankees won, so now we all bow down
To any preening prick or mouthy clown
Who occupies the White House. What a cheat!
The Yankees won – so now we all bow down
To tyranny’s enduring crazy seat.

–Tom Riley