Still Not Gay

Still Not Gay

Shea’s not gay. Those accounts are all spurious—
And they’re making our hero plain furious.
Buddy, watch what you say!
Shea insists he’s not gay.
Shea’s not gay – just a little bit curious.

–Tom Riley

Muumuu Models

Muumuu Models

Mark’s candidate is in a muumuu now.
He’s thinking he should maybe try that out.
Moving far past the point of ugly cow,
Mark’s candidate is in a muumuu now.
She’s hiding a colostomy, the sow!
Can Mark Shea look still worse? I have no doubt.
Mark’s candidate is in a muumuu now.
He’s thinking he should maybe try that out.

–Tom Riley