Reading Maketh a Full Man
General Jimmy Mattis is a reader.
He’s read a lot of books, he’ll have you know.
In literary land a trick-or-treater,
He looks in pumpkin eyes and loves the glow.
The handsome passersby he opts to blow
Have not, of course, read half so much as he.
They wait in cold encampments, row on row.
They’re practicing their own philosophy.
How can a polymath of such depth be?
How can such Stoic virtue yet perdure?
Don’t be a jerk, Marine! Don’t balk! Don’t flee!
For what ails modern man, there’s just one cure:
Extensive reading while, serene and slow,
General Mattis gets to work below.