Flammeus Gladius

Carmina et Verba pro Discipulis Meis

Tag: transgender issues

Remarkable Journey of Frederick Wilson

The Remarkable Journey of Frederick Wilson

Frederick was abbreviated “Rick”
Instead of “Fred.” That truly was step one.
But, when in bathroom stall he first sucked dick,
Rick Wilson then advanced his course – a ton!
Yes, polishing another sort of gun
Affected him in ways that went real deep:
It was transformative, not simply fun.
Calling that thrill to mind, he couldn’t sleep.
Transition surgery is far from cheap.
The Lincoln Project, though, made money fast.
Rick sowed indeed, so now he gets to reap:
He’ll cease to be bald-headed, hairy-assed.
Instead, he’ll be George Conway’s little chickie.
Hey, world: be positive! Say hi to Rikki!

–Tom Riley

(This is the before picture. Rikki owns the copyright on all the after pictures.)

De Matribus Heroicis Federationis Russianae

De Matribus Heroicis Federationis Russianae

Putin’s rewarding moms for having kids.
Back here, we’re hot to change our children’s sex.
To loony boxes we have lost the lids.
Putin’s rewarding moms for having kids—
While perverts over here are making bids
On boys dressed up as girls. Clear disconnects:
Putin’s rewarding moms for having kids;
Back here, we’re hot to change our children’s sex.

–Tom Riley

New Papal Pastoral Priority

A New Papal Pastoral Priority

Of course this pope would opt to meet with trannies.
Did he wear lipstick, though, for the occasion?
Granddads who have remade themselves as grannies
Would be impressed – and that’s called moral suasion.
Of papal duties there is no evasion—
And preaching in support of such perversion
Is, much like slapping every little Asian,
A vital duty. Cast no dark aspersion!
Trannies and queers aren’t making an incursion!
Instead, they’re joyfully exemplifying
A bright new age of unrestrained immersion
In cool baptismal waters. Pope ain’t lying!
This meeting was both glorious and nice.
On fashion, too, the pope got great advice.

–Tom Riley

Rules-Based Order Crowd

The Rules-Based Order Crowd

The rules-based order which these pricks defend
Is such a load of shit, the smell would choke
A goat. As they quite visibly descend
Into a state inspired by meth or coke
Or both, their solemn speeches are a joke—
And all their threats as vain as tranny tits.
Touting their wealth, they’ll soon learn they are broke.
Touting their strength, they’ll soon prove helpless shits.
Right now it’s evident they’ve lost their wits.
Their spokesmouth, who was formerly a fool,
Is now a senile fool. He snorts, and spits,
And then insists he’s competent and cool.
How can such hopeless boneheads cast a spell?
Believe them and they’ll drag you down as well.

–Tom Riley

I Love a Girl in Uniform

I Love a Girl in Uniform

Lesbians used to find a happy place
In military life – but now it’s trannies.
That is a fact the dykes will have to face.
Now chicks with dicks will ogle female fannies.
Now former girls who’ve sacrificed their tits
Will be in charge, aloof, at renamed bases.
Don’t dare complain the brass have lost their wits!
The cards are dealt. You just don’t hold the aces.
Come over here with me. I saved a seat
For every one of you. I’m pouring whiskey.
You can have rocks – although I drink it neat.
Too much sobriety is also risky.
There might be more to do than drink and talk.
On the wild side, why don’t you take a walk?

–Tom Riley

Star of the Show

Star of the Show

Lloyd Austin wants you, soldier boy, to know
That gender bullshit isn’t shit at all:
It’s science. Ready for the donkey show?
You will not be the donkey, please recall:
You will not be the one to have a ball
Or even watch remote from donkey dick.
Up on Lloyd Austin’s stage, you’ll writhe and crawl.
Even if you’re a hunk, you’ll be the chick.
When Austin tells you to, you’ll turn the trick
That’s scheduled – and sincerely like it, too!
You can’t object that progress here is sick.
That is what backward types like Putin do!
Accept your country’s standards, now in style—
And keep in mind: we want to see that smile!

–Tom Riley

Zelensky’s Friendship

Zelensky’s Friendship

Hey, soldier! When you have your tranny shower,
Perhaps our ally, brave Volodymyr,
Will slip in close to you. You’ll feel his power
Radiate – but you’ll have no cause for fear.
Remember: you are fighting for the queer
Nowadays – and for gender liberation.
Those have become our highest values here
As it perdures, the noble Yankee nation.
Putin may make a macho demonstration
Of judo skill – but such is not your task.
You must accept our worldview’s penetration,
Be boosted frequently, and wear a mask.
This is the price you’ll pay – but, lad, it’s cheap:
Zelensky’s friendship won’t go very deep.

–Tom Riley

Unpassable

Unpassable

He put on makeup like a girl
But couldn’t void that facial stubble.
On lashes he imposed a curl.
He put on makeup – like a girl
Who thinks to snag a duke or earl.
Fred Flintstone more that Betty Rubble,
He put on makeup like a girl—
But couldn’t void that facial stubble.

–Tom Riley

Payment Forever Due

Payment Forever Due

Joe sanctioned Russia, folks – but you’re the ones
Who’ve paid, are paying, and will always pay.
Don’t worry, though. At least he’s seizing guns!
Joe sanctioned Russia, folks. But you’re the ones
He really means to punish. May your sons
Be trannies soon! It’s all in Biden’s day.
Joe sanctioned Russia, folks, but you’re the ones
Who’ve paid, are paying, and will always pay.

–Tom Riley

Concerning Arms and Legs

Concerning Arms and Legs

Asked about arms and legs, abortionists
Are pissed that such a question should arise.
Their little hands they tighten into fists.
A hot flame flares behind their angry eyes.
Republicans must learn to recognize
That facts aren’t facts and can’t be certified.
When fetuses are slaughtered, no one dies.
Dismemberment, once earnestly decried,
Does not occur. And terms thus misapplied
Give grave offense to baby-killing docs.
Also, please now acknowledge on your side
That men have wombs and women can have cocks.
If you will not say this, you’re right-wing fools.
You will be judged by non-judgmental rules.

–Tom Riley