Service with a Smile

by flammeusgladius

Service with a Smile



“Our schools,” he says, “are in tremendous shape!
How foolish can your criticism be?
All of our athletes get to break the tape.
All of our teachers endlessly agree
To teach the students in conformity
With standards that our world cannot escape.
Our every move promotes equality.
I myself ought to wear a bright red cape!
Why? Because I beat down the giant ape
That seeks to orate disrespectfully
About our older students. Mouths may gape—
But I proceed apace. Hey, look and see!
I don’t dread comments on the Twitterscape.
I serve grown men our little girls to rape!”



–Tom Riley



(School superintendent sees no larger implications in rape of 14-year-old by adult illegal “student.”)