Fr. Jenkins Explains It All to You

by flammeusgladius

Fr. Jenkins Explains It All to You

Jenkins of Notre Dame is quite upset.
These child molesters shouldn’t be regarded
As monsters! They are often golden-hearted—
And that’s a fact we oughtn’t to forget.
It’s true! The pederasts whom he has met,
Although from their perversions never parted,
Are sterling figures not to be discarded.
With therapy, they’ll be perfected yet!
Punishment, brethren, ain’t the Christian way.
Forgive your fellow Christian if he’s tardy
In virtue – and don’t claim he has to pay!
Your average youngster’s really pretty hardy
And will emerge unscathed some shining day.
It’s fabulous! Come on, boys: slumber party!

–Tom Riley