Lard-Ass Lap Dance

by flammeusgladius

Lard-Ass Lap Dance

Against wild right-wing crazies, balanced Shea
Defends Netflix – plus child pornography.
Puritans in the loony GOP
Will bow to his supremacy today.
Cuties of course is more than A-okay:
It’s necessary viewing finally,
Expanding our horizons. Hey, let’s be
More tolerant of pre-pubescent play!
Clearly Shea is a ginger Santa Claus—
A cheery Father Christmas kind of chap
In Pseudo-Chestertonia. His laws
Are not lean laws. His mind evades the trap
Of moralistic judgment. Why? Because
He dreams of cuties squirming in his lap.

–Tom Riley


Netflix Faces Boycott After 'Cuties' Scene Goes Viral

(Planned Parenthood ally Mark Shea sticks up for Cuties.)